Better

I woke up at 6AM
Made a chocolaty dessert for a good bye party.
Had good time in the word.
But my heart hurts.

I will admit that I am a Christian that totally afraid to die, I live my life in a manner that is careful. Yes I will travel anywhere but I never put myself in danger. Death seems so scary and unknown. I have never met a person that has been there and is alive to tell me about it. Sure there are the "White Light" people, but I hate bright lights so why would I be excited about a bright white one? And the Bible talks of singing (which I suck at), streets of gold (which would be extremely bright), and being naked (I don't even like to look at myself that way).

I know, I know it will be AMAZING and my fear is stupid. But I still have it, even as I type my heart is beating super fast and I'm afraid.

It is so hard to fathom.